Did Pete the pig really rape and impregnate a woman in Texas?
There's a pig farm owner in Texas is claiming that she was raped by a pig and is now pregnant?
I was born and raised in Texas and knowing the women folk there, I would be more inclined to believe it was consensual.
Angie Houston is not just a pig farmer, but a miniature golf enthusiast who after an exhaustive round of putt putt with her friends she was sexually assaulted by her truffle eating pet.
But the story doesn't just end there. She now claims to be 7 months pregnant!
Of course I have questions. Texas sized questions...
#1 How did the pig get her panties off?
#2 What would a possible pig baby look like?
#3 will the pig now have to register as a sex offender?
#1 How did the pig get her panties off?
Pete is the largest pig on Angie's farm weighing over 400 pounds.
As Angie was approaching the house, she claims that grunted then charged at her, ramming her with his head. When she fell to the ground he climbed on top of her and raped her.
But a pig has a cloven hoof, how did her get her panties down?
Angie's response...
“Well to be honest I wasn’t wearing any panties that day and this pig has been hot for me for many years.
I'm just going to leave that there for a bit and let it sink in...
(jeopardy theme) or crickets
She continued saying...
“He constantly sniffs at my genitals when I am tending to his food or bedding. “He tried to rape me a number of times over the past 2 years, but this is the first time I wasn’t able to get away.”
I'm starting to believe there should be a 4th question, like why didn't she get a restraining order on this pig or turn him into bacon?
#2
What would a possible pig baby look like?
According to Angie she has never had consensual sex with anyone because of her religious beliefs, so the baby can only be Pete the pigs!
Can you imagine if this had gone to Maury and it was proven that he wasn't the baby daddy.
(insert video)
Her father when speaking to the Dallas Morning News said they believed her faith based claims of abstinence.
But when describing Pete had this to say:
“Pete has always been a bad tempered little sod and very difficult to handle most of the time, especially when he is being sexual towards my daughter. I am not surprised that this rape has happened, I am surprised it took so long if I’m honest”
When it comes to the baby, Angie says she's just waiting and wants to be surprised to see what her baby looks like and hopes that its not just some kind of mutant pig and just comes out looking like a “normal human baby.” (picture of honey boo boo or mom)
Kinda like her huh?
#3 will Pete the pig now have to register as a sex offender?
Not now, because according to news reports Angie's father said :
“After this incident, I sent Pete off to the slaughter house for sausages and bacon which is helping to feed Angela and her baby; after all, she’s eating for two now and needs a lot of extra meat.”
Now is this story a hoax or not?
Happily for Angie and a possible mutant pig baby and sadly for those of us who love nothing more than to watch a real life freak show play out in public it has to be a hoax.
But this didn't stop this story from spreading around the internets at the speed of stupid....How fast is that?
As quickly as stories like this get shared on Facebook, that's really freakin' fast! So fast, it makes light look like Honey Boo Boo's mom running on a treadmill...
“not a still life image, this is live!”
First of all it is biologically impossible for a woman to get pregnant by a pig.
Some people who know this think that even though it can't happen, some poor woman out there made the claim to cover up some unwanted pregnancy.
But I can't seem to find a link to any reputable news service covering this story, and the websites that have posted something about it online are about as trustworthy as Bill O'reilly's claims of war time news reporting.
Source: www.youtube.com
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